I always vary what I have as my wallpaper, but usually I try to make it something that will trigger a positive reaction, but a reaction for growth. Currently I have five separate sentences which are what I want to concentrate on applying to my life at the moment.

The first sentence is more of a trigger for the other four,

“Always Seek Growth”.

These sentences are:

  • Every activity you do is your choice
  • Accept, Learn, Appreciate
  • Taking Action Minimises Regret
  • React with Understanding

Every activity you do is your choice

In every activity that you take part in, you’re making a choice to it. It might be conscious or habit, but it happens because at some point in time you made a decision. There are things we don’t like doing, often work is a big one, and yet you still remain in it. Know that every action taken is, or was at some point, a conscious and free will choice that you made. When you recognise this, things do not seem so terrible. They do not seem so bad because you have the opportunity to consider whether you want to keep making that particular choice or not. You choose to go to work today, you choose to stay in that job, and you choose to watch TV instead of looking for something else, you choose to go out instead of study. Every activity is your choice, so embrace it, or find a way to change it.

The second part of this sentence is also about trying to appreciate the actions. I try to remind myself that as this is my choice, I actually have the opportunity to do this, and it is not that I have to do this. Changing my phrasing on the less desirable events can change my perception of them. I do not particularly enjoy washing up but knowing that I get to use clean water to have clean crockery to eat on is a blessing and not a chore.

Accept, Learn, Appreciate

This applies in particular to when things go bad. We all frequently face situations that we really don’t want to be in, but it’s how we react that decides if it is awful or maybe even good. By remembering these three words in this situation, I have often found it a lot easier to reframe how I look at events. Since I am unable to change what has happened, I ultimately have to accept that it has happened, there’s no sense in getting worked up about it.

The next step is to learn.

What can I learn from this situation to stop it happening again?

What can I learn right now to find my solution to this particular time?

If I can learn a lesson then at the very least one single good thing has come out of this.

Finally, appreciate what has occurred but also, what you still have. If you lose something or someone you loved, try to focus on the appreciation. Appreciate what you got to experience whilst it was a part of your life but also appreciate what you still have right now. You have fond memories of what was and you still have your life, your family, friends, a phone, a computer, a camera, a teddy bear. You still have so much, and often more than we realise, appreciate it.

Taking action minimises regret

They say that it is the things that we don’t do that we regret most. It’s when you are on your deathbed and you wished you had done more, taken that chance. This sentence is to remind me to try and stop overthinking about what could go wrong, and just find out first hand. Obviously, there are limits to this, but often it’s the possibility of a little embarrassment that stops us. I all too often find myself not doing things because I talk myself out of them. However, I do recognise that the times I have taken action, the outcome is better than what I thought it could have being. My regret is minimised.

React with understanding

In application to interactions with others, this is my reminder to try a little bit harder than comfortable to react better. Too often we have someone just push our buttons and we end up getting aggravated. We have this inclination to shout and scream in order to defend our point of view because it feels like an attack on our being. However, this can be explained, most of the time, simply from poor communication. Either we have misinterpreted or the other party has explained poorly. We are more alike than we may wish to admit, but the way in which we communicate the same points of view are completely different.

To think why they are saying what they are saying, if it’s simply a misunderstood reaction to what I have said. Perhaps they are coming from a deep seeded hurt which is not an attack on you but a defence mechanism for their own insecurities. We have no idea what people have really gone through in their own life to form the shape they are in now. So if you hear something you disagree with, try to see from their point of view, whether it is to communicate in the same manner they do, or to realise arguing will get you nowhere.

It’s not definitive

My way of thinking and how I try to view the world is not necessarily how you will view it. If however, you do like and agree with what I’ve written today, you can download the wallpaper for your phone below. Have a great week!

Feel free to let me know your thoughts in the comments below (you can use your Facebook account), email me at hello@wulfwillis.com or DM me on Instagram @wulf.willis

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